Wondering what to expect when visiting the home of your friend, boss, in-law, enemy, crush, even some random for the first time? Their zodiac sign will reveal more than they imagine and how their house is decorated can give you a good idea of what goes on behind closed doors. So lets do some snooping...
ARIES March 21- April 19
Nothing in their house will follow the latest trends, because they couldn’t give a rats ass about what is popular. If you call on them unexpectedly you’ll find their house in a ramshackle state. Not because they’re naturally messy like Pisces, but because they’re juggling so many things at once and are easily distracted from cleaning plans.
The decor is likely to be bold but with clean lines. Maybe a crimson velvet lounge, but there will be no gilt edged French sofas, and definitely no pastels or shabby chic. We’re talking super sleek sectional - usually in red or hot pink. A home office is a given, as they are naturally entrepreneurial. It will have a wall shrine of their accomplishments... which you better notice and comment on. Overflowing bookcases in random rooms. And a 'super inconvenient to the rest of the family' section of the home will be dedicated to their favourite winding down past time, whether thats a yoga mat /meditation corner or a mudroom turned painting studio.
TAURAS April 20 - May 20
Luxury, lots of shiny objects, (crystal chandeliers and copper plant stands) sheep skins and Persian rugs. A deeply comfortable and gorgeous space. They have a keen eye for art, and the walls will be covered with the most expensive original works they can afford (or not but who's counting?) and elegantly framed photographs.
The fridge that costs more than your entire kitchen will have pride of place and will be filled with luxurious concoctions and comfort food - ie lindt chocolates and mashed potato. Of course the kitchen isn’t complete without an impressive cache of fine wines that they take immense pleasure in savouring.
Bath bombs and candles line the bathroom. 4,000 thread count sheets that cost a months wage... and are worth every penny. They work hard for their home luxuries and enjoy showing them off to the world. Dinner parties are a way to showcase their fine taste, and they love to entertain their guests in style. They like keeping up with (but preferably surpassing) the joneses and generally park the fancy new car out the front for the neighbour’s to drool over.
GEMINI May 21 - June 20
When you walk into a Gemini’s house your first impression will be good. Because they are very good at making excellent first impressions. So the foyer will look cohesive and stylised. But the cohesion will not follow through the rest of the house. That’s because Gemini’s change their mind so often, and they crave variety. They prefer mixing it up and matchy match just horrifies them. Their home either looks wildly creative or like a total mess - actually more like a total mess.
So you might walk through a perfectly put together Industrial French style foyer into a half hearted Scandi style living room that looks like Baghdad at its worst, and will trail into a random Farmhouse kitchen... just because. And the bedrooms are definitely going to be different - think Bali wood and white netting or Moroccan turquoise and purple.
Completely random pieces found on their regular exotic travels will be placed haphazardly - a large Japanese geisha painting in the Moroccan bedroom and a electric blue Chinese sideboard sharing space with the scandi sofa and coffee table. They can also rock out unusual colour combinations like orange and lavender or mustard and blush. In fact their environment may actually be too stimulating and the coffee will definitely be on tap.
And just like that a Gemini will get an offer to hop across the globe on a new adventure and the entire mismatched interior is piled into a storage unit for the next 3 years.
CANCER June 21 - July 22
The most insanely comfortable sectional sofa that you didn’t realise even existed on this 3 dimensional planet resides in a cancers house. This is what they live on. It’s where they have their frequent emotional melt downs and it has the softest fluffiest throw blankets for them to hide under until they come out of their sulks.
The second thing of note in their home is their incredibly stocked kitchen. Because they are the perpetual parent they will want to pamper you, and that means feeding you. Sweet things. Probably chocolate. And they made it themselves from scratch because they want you to know how much they care. The house will be a cosy, soothing haven and will showcase their nostalgic streak. Sentimental objects - think grandma’s 70s retro sofa reupholstered in the same but new fabric, decorated with all her frilly doilies, grandpa’s crystal decanter and scotch glasses on the 'dead before his time' uncles side board, a dozen walls will be dedicated family album galleries - who knew kids had so many stages of life worth documenting.
They aren’t above dumpster diving to satisfy their cheap side, often turning castaway furniture into unique one off pieces. They have definitely accumulated too much stuff because they tend to emotionally cling to their cherished possessions.
LEO July 23 - August 22
They will have the biggest flashiest house on the street... with a drool worthy car parked out the front beside a jet ski or speedboat. They will also win the ‘best Christmas decorations on the street’ every year running, and don’t even try to compete because if your house shows signs of one upping theirs... they’ll just double the decorations and wattage to outdo you.
When you get invited to one of their coveted dinner/entertainment parties you should be on the look out for their latest toys and creative hobbies. Always ask if they painted the wall art themselves (because they probably did and definitely like to be recognised for it) and/or upholstered the ottoman with a moroccan rug. Brownie points and second invitations go to aspiring fans. There will be a musical instrument lying around suggestively, so make sure to ask them to play something for the guests. If you get a chance to tour their bedroom definitely ask to check out their closet - it will look like a dressing room at a theatre with everything from feather boas to velvet top hat and matching diamanté brassiere!
VIRGO August 23 - September 22
Everything will match. There will be one style only - probably conservative farmhouse - and all the fabrics in each room will be neutral and match. They love the matching sofa, dining chair and curtain look. Maybe they’ll be bold and have the curtains in a slightly smaller matching print to the sofa. They would secretly prefer all the pillows to match as well but at this stage their partner rebelled *gasp* and insisted on pillows being of a different fabric.... but they will still be the same colour.
The other thing you’ll notice is how neat everything is. Like nobody lives there. And their favorite shop is obviously a Howards Storage World because there is a designated spot for everything - from the wall hooks beside the door for dog leads, umbrellas etc to the partitioned drawer in the foyer side table with labels for keys, coins, mail, to the matching bottles in the bathroom for soap, cream, face cream, eye cream... you get it!
Their bathroom draw will be full of medicines (or their kitchen draw full of herbs if they’re into alternate medicine) ready to combat any illnesses lurking unexpectantly.
And please remember to hang the tea towel back neatly folded so the ends meet because we don’t want to add to their stress by leaving the house any different to how we found it.
LIBRA September 23 - October 22
Their home will have beautiful bones. An architectural home with high ceilings and gorgeous views. But it will be half empty. This is because Libra, having finally decided on which house to buy is too exhausted and overwhelmed to actually choose furniture for it. And if their spouse can actually drag them to a furniture store they will be unable to get a decision out of them before the meltdown commences from having to make the decision. So the house will stay half empty for years and everyone will get used to it.
The other thing to note is the extremely random pieces in the house that came from odd legacies. They are too sentimental to sell it so will have a 70s shag carpet in their slick dining room that is void a dining table. Or an Art Deco lamp on the floor beside a mattress in the yet to be furnished guest room.
The other thing you can depend on - your wedding gift will always, always be on display when your invited over for a meal... but if you turn up unexpectedly you are unlikely to find it in its regular spot. This is because your Libra friends hates it but would never ever offend you and will always haul it out from it’s hiding spot when you're expected.
SCORPIO October 23 - November 21
The second you receive an invitation from your ferociously sexy Scorpio friend you need to start plotting how to distract their attention for long enough to snoop through their bedroom and closet, and definitely their basement if they have one.
When you walk in to their house, sensory overwhelm is that weird feeling you'll get but can't put a name to. They take sexy eclectic bohemianism to the rock star level. The colors will be intense, the objet d'art and textile collection vast with sacred geometry lamps sitting between busts of Himeros and a collection of antique (but still in use) ouija boards.
You'll be served a Stinger Cocktail and Limburger cheese, this should get you in the mood for watching your Scorpio friend relish dropping half a dozen hapless lobsters into boiling water.
When taking the tour note the satin sheets (they think the sexiness is worth the occasional sliding off the bed onto the floor) in their bedroom and its best to compliment the oversize nude painting of them hanging above the bed. Make sure to look up to see the ornate mirror on the ceiling above the bed. A Karma Sutra book will lie suggestively open at a hopeful position and there will be numerous wood carvings of god’s with oversized genitals placed tastefully around. By this time you're feeling pretty envious.
But really it’s their closet or basement that contains all the deep dark secrets that scorpios hoard like the rest of us hoard shoes. But beware of them catching you finding out their secrets. Their sting is up to the reputation it has earned.
SAGITTARIUS November 22 - December 21
The few times your Sag friend is actually in town and not exploring another remote country you've never heard of, you'll always be invited over as they love to catch up with their friends in every country. You'll snap the invitation up as you know it'll be a scream of a night hearing all about their latest misadventures.
They'll be in a new location as they like to rent in-between adventures and only keep a permanent storage space for their things. However by the time they've furnished the house from their storage unit it wont look anything like a rental. Eclectic to the extreme, you'll walk past a Peruvian shamans sceptre wrapped around a dried ayahuasca vine in the foyer, but you'll only know this after asking what that incredibly random object is. You'll laugh heartily at the hilarious story of their jungle adventure with the psychedelic vine while quietly swearing to yourself to never go near the Amazon.
Your Sag friend will leave you in the living room while they finish getting dinner ready and you'll be able to explore the treasures they've accumulated along their adventures. A vintage Miao wedding blanket draped over the back of the sofa, a many breasted fertility goddess from Mesopotamia adorning the coffee table, and your friend returning with a couple of Tibetan ringing bowls serving up your duck pate along side an unexpected side of psychedelic mushrooms.
The furniture will be large and functional to entertain their many friends and sturdy to withstand their constant clumsiness. No pets or plants even though they love both, they are gone too often to keep either alive.
You'll be dismayed but not surprised to discover dinner will be served outside in sub zero conditions, as Sag's do not like to feel confined and prefer the discomfort of cold weather to the feeling of being closed in.
You wont have to sneak into their bedroom, just ask and they'll happily show you every kinky and kooky thing they've got going on in there. Random items like a suspicious looking eggplant on their side table will have you wondering, but unless you like hearing detailed sexual escapades best to pretend you didn't see it.
Sadly within a few week you'll see the inevitable post on instagram, and your fav Sag friend will be off singing Kirtans in a Maha Devi ashram in Bora Bora.
CAPRICORN December 22 - January 19
When visiting your Capricorn boss for dinner in the hope it will lead to that much coveted promotion, the instructions will be to look for the largest house on the street, which will be located in a fancy neighbourhood. But don't expect anything out of the ordinary. The house will be elegant, but very conventional. Probably dark grey or brown and lots of stone and marble for solidarity.
The interior will be intimidatingly elegant, while at the same time a little boring in the colour palette department. Nothing eccentric here, not random objects from travel, or sentimental pieces of furniture. No this house has been designed to the last detail by a professional interior designer and the instructions were to 'impress the guests'. This will include some expensive antiques, but more along the lines of a solid colonial side board in teak, rather than a delicate and frilly Parisian dining table. Anyway the whole house will be perfectly cohesive from the entryway right to the laundry.
You will be taken in to the formal lounge with its impressive view of the city, the house having been carefully chosen for the view so your Capricorn boss can gloat over the city he deigned to reside in. Here you will be served drinks already decanted to the perfect temperature and a ridiculously expensive cheese platter. They are big on family meals so the kids will be included at the dining table and the meal will have been cooked to perfection by the Capricorn using only the best of ingredients.
There's no point snooping in this house as nothing of interest is kept hidden away and besides its your boss's house and there will be no promotion if you're caught.
AQUARIUS January 20 - February 18
If you ever do get invited to your highly fascinating and highly aloof Aquarian friends house expect to be wowed but know that it wont be cosy. Aquarians are all about modern and futuristic, so things are going to get a little weird at their house.
Entry gates that swing up into the sky instead of rolling to the side like everyone else's. Automated lights that light up your entry and turn a different colour the second you're past them. When you step inside it will have a trendy warehouse office feel - a lot of open space, over sized windows and high ceilings with exposed steel frames. Glass blown light fixtures and water cascading down one wall with blue and silver lights behind.
You'll all sit down for fancy hor dourves on one of those highly impractical round lobby sofa lounges and have to crane your neck for an hour to chat with the others sitting behind you on the same sofa. When you are thankfully led in to dinner it will be beautifully set on a polished concrete dining table (that so perfectly compliments their bare polished concrete floor) next to the gushing water wall... but thank god you can now give your cricked neck a rest. There will be one random statue in the middle of the table that turns out to be an extremely rare african carving, although this doesnt stop it from blocking your view of everyone else at the dinner party.
Your friend is likely to disappear into their lab or technology riddled home office every now and then to check up on the latest advances of whatever they're currently concocting to save the world. You can spend that time snooping the rest of their house. Their bedroom will be suspended like a loft high above the living area (because they are an air sign), and if you make it up there you'll be surprised at the empty space, one oversized mirror reflecting the windows and one raised bed made of plain metal with a brushed metallic surface and enhanced with scaffolding poles. No sign of anything else of practical value.
It might not be a particularly cosy evening out, but the experience (unlikely to be repeated) will undoubtedly be ahead of its time, thereby perfectly complimenting your Aquarius friend.
PISCES February 19 - March 20
What to remember when visiting your piscean friend is that they are the wateriest of water signs and highly value their own space. So expect a short drive to the outskirts of town, most likely near a random lake or river that you never even knew existed and have no idea how they found.
The front yard will have a very zen vibe to it, probably with a softly trickling waterfall and a buddha nestled next to it, half hidden by a few bonsai, maybe a Mary Jane or two.
Don't be dismayed if their home entrance resembles a storefronts psychic's parlour. Just know that they lead highly fantastical internal lives that we can only skirt the edges of. Walking into their living room will only increase the theatrical vibe what with their velvet theatre curtains fastened with tassel tie backs and the random spiritual altar where most people would place a tv. Incense will be gently filling the interior with a healing and calming scent, and different hued crystals will be strategically placed for the best Vastu effect. This fantasy room will bizarrely lead on to an empty or spare looking dining room. Because a Piscean is a person of many moods and different rooms need to cater to their different moods.
Visiting their bathroom is a must, it will have a huge highly used (and highly coveted) spa bath - probably surrounded by mermaid tiles and inlaid rose quartz crystals.
A sneak look into their bedroom will reveal a decadent boudoir, and a rummage through their drawers will reveal their cache of psychedelics that take their fantasy world to a dimension we can't even imagine.
Thats all 12 star signs. Let me know in the comments below if any of this resonates with you, or someone you know. Don't be shy, I want details😆
Hi! Thank God my Libra husband is married to me – a Capricorn! He doesn’t understand my need for throw pillows, and I don’t care! My bed is spot on with 3 euros on a king bed, pillows, and pillows with shams on last. Always! But I love a cozy house 😊
WRONG! A slightly maximalist Capricorn, I love color, great works of art, antiques, and objects from around the globe.
Haha Kate if the signs aren’t compatible for living space it can definitely be a battle. I’m Gemini so my Libra husband finds my style odd and erratic, he’s always wanting to minimise and sell off some furniture😬… luckily he mostly lets me have my way decorating the house😅
Yes Willow you got it pretty spot on with me a Libra, and I married a Pisces so now I know why we battle with decorating together. (Kate_EclekticVintage)